A SMELLY Affair - soap is your friend!

Personal hygiene is not optional! Dear God, Trish and I sat next to the smelliest man on earth last night at A Catered Affair. It was worse than a subway car full of homeless people in the middle of summer. His assault on my olfactory system prompted a theatre-going first for me - I asked to be moved to another seat. Yes, after five minutes breathing in this nasty man’s stench I suggested to Trish we speak to an usher about being moved. Anywhere. We were already in the second to last row of the balcony, so we really had nothing to lose. Since the reviews were mixed to negative and knowing the producers were heavily papering the house (supplying various outlets with complimentary tickets on the sly to give the illusion of a full theatre), we were sure we’d get seats somewhere. So we approached a friendly looking usher and explained our situation. She gave us a sympathetic look and said, “I’m sorry, but we’re sold out.” What the f*ck? How is that possible? I picked up TDF tickets that afternoon online! So we waited it out thinking there would definitely be no-shows. At 8:01 PM the theatre was completely full and we were left standing at the back of the balcony. I told Trish that I would rather stand for the whole show than sit next to that smelly guy. Then a miracle happened - praise, Jesus - a young usher came up to us and asked if we would mind sitting in a box seat. We said, “Hell’s no.” Actually, we said, “That would be great, thank you,” and followed her down to the front of the mezzanine. And thus I have been prompted to publish my first web poll. So please prove to me that I'm not just writing in a cyber void (it would also greatly improve my self-esteem) by scrolling down on the left and answering my "theatre pet peeve" poll.

Reviews be damned because I loved this show. I probably shouldn’t have read them or the chat board bullsh*t before seeing the show, but I honestly can’t understand how the reviews and public opinion on All That Chat could be so off base. The performances were spectacular, especially Tom Wopat (make room on your bookshelf for a Tony) and Faith Prince. The music was completely character and situation appropriate. No, there weren’t any bombastic power ballads. These characters are simple, salt of the earth, and their music reflected this. In fact, the music and book were so fully integrated that you almost didn’t notice when someone began to sing or when a song ended. Many reviews complained that there weren’t any “real” songs, just lots of recitative type snippets. I disagree. Maybe from my background in opera I’ve developed an ear more attuned to subtleties of melody, but there were definitely “real” songs in the score and actually very little that could be classified as recitative.

I can't say enough about the quality of the acting. The naturalistic approach to the material only emphasized the world-weariness of the characters and the joyless repetition that examplifies their mundane lives. The audience seemed completely riveted to the stage. The ninety-minute, intermissionless show seemed to fly by. On a side note, Prince's pushy, strong-willed mother hit a bit close to home for Trish and I. I can't believe this is the same woman I saw play Adelaide in the Broadway revival of Guys and Dolls. When did we get so old?