Shrek

You’d think $20 million would pretty much guarantee a perfect Broadway production. Well, you’d be wrong. When I wasn’t yawning or wondering how Shrek the Musical’s creators stretched a wisp of a plot over three hours, there were some mildly entertaining moments. Not that the physical production didn’t look expensive. Costumes were often gorgeous, backdrops and moving scenery were plentiful and the onstage talent - aside from the merely adequate Sutton Foster u/s who was on last night, more on her later - was obviously the best that money could buy. But money can’t buy an interesting book or creative staging (exception: the hilarious contraption that allowed the towering Chris Sieber to appear four-feet tall. My knees ache for him). My proof? - the three bobbing heads in front of me, each of whom fell asleep more than once during the show.

Though ugly, it was clear the unimaginatively used hydraulic turntable dominating the set took a huge bite out of the producers’ budget. It’s a poor man’s Pride Rock. But I can’t help thinking that it was retained only because it had already been bought and installed and that some angry producer told director Jason Moore, “I don’t care if you don’t need it anymore. Use that damn thing because I already paid for it.” The exiled fairy tale characters were basically extraneous, too. They showed up for a song in the first fifteen minutes and then returned in the last fifteen minutes because it seemed, once again, the producers wanted to get their moneys’ worth out of the costumes.

Unlike others, I didn’t have a problem with a creative team choosing to develop the Shrek stories into a musical. Unfortunately, little was done to create an engaging or interesting storyline. There were no real obstacles for Shrek to overcome. I mean, come on, in the rescue scene characters literally run past the dragon to escape. There was no fight or confrontation, just a lot of mimed running - a lot of it. Of course, how hard could it be to run past a creature that consists solely of a large head and no apparent appendages?

You know there’s trouble when the most interesting character on the stage isn’t the title character, but the peripheral character of Lord Farquaad. Yes, he does set the plot in motion, but the most interesting numbers involved his back-story - all well and good had I been watching Lord Farquaad the Musical. When it comes down to it, I guess Shrek’s main problem is that not much actually happens. The show is basically a thinly developed quest story chock full of meaningless filler and fart jokes that don’t really help to move what little plot there is along.

With the exception of the many derivative Motown-like songs for Donkey, the score by Jeanine Tesori was for the most part tuneful and sophisticated (well, maybe not the fart/belch contest in “I Got You Beat”) considering the source material. There was a cleverness and sincerity in the score and lyrics that wasn’t mirrored in the “anything-to-make-you-laugh” desperation of the book. I found myself yearning to see the show that matched the songs rather than the other way around.

As mentioned earlier, Chris Sieber steals the show with his take on a wannabe with daddy issues. Brian D’Arcy James does the best he can while saddled with a fat suit and prosthetics. Unfortunately, originality is not what is asked of him, considering the movie character is so indelibly imprinted on our brains. He sings beautifully and has some wonderfully vulnerable moments with both Donkey and Fiona. Daniel Breaker does what he can with Donkey, but comes off as a pale Eddie Murphy impersonator. Sarah Jane Everman, on for Sutton Foster’s Fiona, was adequate. Her speaking voice is a dead ringer for Kristin Chenowith, but without the fun, quirkiness that makes Cheno bearable. Again, her singing was adequate but with some definite pitch issues and the chemistry between her and Shrek was non-existent. She was solidly average. I wonder if there is a considerable difference in how the show plays with Foster in? Well, I’ll most likely never find out, considering I don’t plan on returning unless a free ticket lands in my greedy hands.