Pompeii

We're only on our fourth day of the cruise and I'm exhausted.  It's been a crazy couple of days and we've been jet-setting like a Kennedy - Geneva, Barcelona, Pisa, Florence, Rome and Vatican City.  Today's adventure brings us to Pompeii, the ancient city once buried and preserved under tons of volcanic ash.  Trish and I got our Pompeii appetite whetted at the Discovery Times Square's Pompeii exhibit earlier this summer. 

Our guide for today is Paulo, Joe Banana's brother.  "Who the hell is Joe Banana?" you're probably asking yourself.  No, it's not some hot new porn star, it's our Italian tour operator.  We booked all our Italian excursions through Joe Banana rather than paying for the excursions offered by the ship.  Trust me, it ends up being way cheaper and you get a private guide all to yourself.  No waiting around for that one slowpoke or having to hear endless stupid questions from that guy in the weird hat wearing black socks with his sneakers.  You know the one.

Just like Vatican City, only licensed tour guides are allowed in Pompeii.  So to save some money, we decided not to hire a separate Pompeii tour guide.  Guess who was put in charge of the map?  Surprisingly, Pompeii is full of stray dogs.  Here I am in the main square with my new best friend. 

 

Exploring the Temple of Apollo, Trish finds a statue of the hottie and basks in his glowing presence in the morning sunlight. 

Juan poses in front of some big ass pillars.

 

Which ancient God is that?  Oh, silly, that's just me and my muffin top.

 

If those damn beautiful, fluffy clouds weren't hanging around, you'd be able to see Mount Vesuvius.

This is the inside of the ancient baths.  Half-naked, muscled men adorning the inside of the men's steamroom?  More things that make you go "hmmmmm." 

 

Trish, Val and Juan strike a pose in the ruins of one of ancient Pompeii's wealthiest family homes.  Sadly, it appears ancient Pompeiians lived way better than I do.

 

This is the smaller amphitheatre in Pompeii's theatre complex.  Yes, they had a theatre complex.

 

This is the larger theatre in the complex - the Broadway in Pompeii.  Trish and Val are watching a revival of a show called "Annoying Tourists Over-run the Theatre!"

 

Juan cannot resist the urge to stand center stage.  He serenaded us with snippets of Italian arias, much to the delight of our fellow tourists.

 

Unfortunately, mom couldn't walk around the ruins with us because of the cobblestone streets.  But she was able to explore the main street and square.

 

After a couple of hours exploring, all the ruins started to look the same.  So we decided to hit the road for the Amalfi Coast, but not before a quick picture.  Coincidentally, we ran into a lovely American family from our ship who took this picture of us.  

If your going to Pompeii, go early.  No one was in line when we got there, but when we left 2 hours later, line down the street.  Oh well, Onward to Positano!

This morning's itinerary:

Dock at the port of Naples 

Meet up with our driver and guide, Paulo

Drive to Pompeii

Next Day in Sicily

Afternoon in Positano and Sorrento

Previous Day in Rome

I Say A Little Prayer...in Vatican City!

After our whirlwind, 5-hour "Best of Rome" tour, Max rushed us to Vatican City to meet up with our Museum tour guide, Vanessa.  Apparently, only licensed Vatican tour guides are allowed to give tours within the Vatican's walls.  We met Vanessa at the Museum entrance (above) which also happens to be the entrance to the world's smallest country - the sovereign city-state of Vatican City.  As the religious center of the Catholic Church, I was terrified that lightning might strike me dead upon setting foot on the holy grounds, me being an abomination and all.

Here we are, with the nipple of St. Peter's Basilica poking through the trees in the Vatican gardens.

Here I am, checking out the view from one of the museum windows.  Still no lightning.

One of the many amazing ceilings within the Vatican Museum.

And yet another ridiculously beautiful ceiling in the Museum.

Me and Hermes are just hangin' in the Octagonal Courtyard.  He's wearing a long cape and a hat, but where are his pants? ---- Things that make you go "hmmmm."

The courtyard also houses The Gabinetto del Laocoonte, billed as the most beautiful statue in the Vatican Museum.  Totally understandable.  But again, no pants?  Hmmmm.

The animal gallery was just a bit creepy, but cool.

Yet another beautiful Vatican ceiling.

Here we are surrounded by more statues, our faces shiny with sweat.  Did I mention the Vatican Museum is not air conditioned?  Hey Benedict, sell one of those statues and install some a.c. already! 

This is the floor where we're standing above.

Yes, more ceilings.

And one more.

OK, maybe just one more.  This is the Gallery of Maps, one of the most amazing exhibits in the Museum.  It's a long corridor lined with maps of the various Italian regions.  On the ceiling accompanying each map are paintings and murals of scenes related to the history of each region.

Above, the exit to the Gallery of Maps.  Impressive, huh?  

For all you aspiring pickpockets, might I suggest getting your feet wet in the Sistine Chapel (our next stop on the tour, but sadly, no photographs were allowed).  Imagine a darkened room filled with foreign tourists brimming with Euros, staring up at the ceiling, oblivious to anything happening around them as they stand awestruck by the artwork surrounding them.

Ah, the inside of Saint Peter's Basilica.  I'm not a religious person, but I was raised Catholic so it was actually quite humbling and, dare I say, inspiring, to enter the world's largest Catholic Church.  I mean, seriously, how can you not be impressed? 

Yes, yet another ceiling, but as Vern always says on Design Star, lighting is everything.

The Pineda family huddled up once again for a photo in front of the altar at Saint Peter's.  And no, Val is not sunburned - though that's pretty much how she looks after a day at the beach, even with 100 spf sunscreen.   She was actually so overcome with emotion that she broke down crying - or maybe it was just the last 9-hours of non-stop walking.

The Pope's Balcony - it's good to be Pope.

The famous Saint Peter's Square.  It's destroyed almost as often as NYC is in movies (Angels and Demons, 2012). 

A final shot of the family as we exit Vatican City.  We were running almost 2-hours late to meet up with Max for the drive back to the ship, but Vanessa didn't really seem to care.  "I just want to show you one more thing," she kept saying.  Famous last words.

If you're in Rome, I highly recommend Rome Connection and ask for Max (far left) or Vanessa (far right).

On our ride back to the ship from Rome, Max introduced us to our new favorite Italian candy, Fruit Joy.  It's sort of a cross between a jellybean, a gum drop and a sour patch kid.

Tonight's towel animal.

This Afternoon's Itinerary:

Vatican City and Museums

Sistine Chapel

St. Peter’s Basilica

St. Peter’s Square

Drive back to Port of Civitavecchia

Next Day in Pompeii and Amalfi Coast 
 Morning in Rome

Previous Day in Florence and Pisa

Roma

I'm home at last - Rome's Gay Village!  Well, it's not just for the gays.  According to Max (our Roman guide), it's basically a huge, summer-long party that takes place at a park in Rome complete with theatre, sports, clubs, concerts, dancing and food.  Hmmm...sounds pretty gay to me - except maybe the sports.  Max says it's where all the cool, young people hang in the summer.  Well, duh, It is the Gay Village!

Our first stop in Rome (unfortunately, we were up way too early for the Gay Village) was the Circus Maximus.  I'm sure in its day it was impressive with the chariot races and all, but now it's just a big ol' field of gravel.  No worries, the spot also afforded us a great view of Palatine Hill (behind us), the ancient Roman equivalent of Beverly Hills.  

The myth of Romulus and Remus is the story of the founding of Rome.  Max explained it to us - something about twins and virgins and a wolf.  I don't know, something shiny caught my eye and I stopped listening.  Or maybe I was just lulled by the Italian accent.  Eez tah-roo, day reel-lee sound-ah like-ah dees.  Who knew?  Anyway, this is the Belvedere Romolo e Remo (where we're standing, above). 

And here are the ruins near the Colosseum.  And some Roman traffic, too.

  

The Pineda clan strikes a pose in front of the Roman Colosseum. 

Max is quite the photographer, isn't he?

Max's Tourist Tip #1: Always take a picture of the signage so you can remember where the hell you've been.

Here's the plaque outside of the Colosseum (aka Flavian Amphitheatre).  I have no idea what it says, but Max told me to take a picture of it.  And you do what Max says, bitches!

Here's the inside of the Colosseum. 

Where my gladiators at? 

Mom and dad couldn't maneuver all the steps in the Colosseum, so we left them with a gelato vendor and a fist full of Euros while Max took the young'ens (relatively speaking) on a tour.  For once, Val looks normal and I'm making an ass face. 

A view of the Arco di Costantino from the Colosseum.

Max's Tourist Tip #2:  The proper way to throw a coin into Fontana di Trevi (Trevi Fountain) is with your back to the fountain, tossing the coin with your right hand over the left shoulder.

Trish and I have just made 30 Euros worth of wishes.  Unfortunately, I later found out that you don't make wishes at the fountain, but instead, tossing coins guarantees that you return to Rome again.  Hmmm...what if one of my wishes is to return to Rome?  Then if it happens, technically, I'm getting my wish.  Think about it.

Up next on Max's whirlwind tour of Rome, a visit to The People's Square.

The Obelisk in the square is actually from Heliopolis, Egypt.  You can't tell from the picture, but if you stand directly in front of it, the square is a mirror image.  Fancy.

 The square also abuts (tee-hee) the North Gate of the Aurelian Wall, which was the Northern entrance to ancient Rome.  It now separates old Rome from modern Rome.  Yes, historically important, but I just thought it was pretty.

On closer inspection, I see my name on the gate.  I love it even more now.  But alas, the gate is not named after another famous "Fausto," but in this context is part of a Latin phrase translating to "may your entrance be prosperous and happy" - quite appropriate for an entrance gate, not so much for a lower back tattoo on a go-go boy.  Picture it and you'll get it.  Or not.

Flanking the outside of the gate is a statue of St. Paul on one side and...

...St. Peter on the other.  Rome is filled with random, beautiful statues of saints and emperors, all with incredibly chiseled arms and six-pack abs (check out Peter's forearm definition).  Who knew ancient Rome was just like toga night at Splash?

We've been going non-stop all morning, running from marble statue to marble building to marble ruin.  We love our tour guide Max, but he and his long, blond-highlighted tresses (he's a former hair stylist) are indefatigable and we need a break.  We beg for mercy (and a toilet) so Max brings us to his favorite siesta spot, Piazza Navona.

Here's the view of the Piazza from our table at Bar Navona.  It's here that Val had her angel choir moment and discovered San Benedetto iced tea.  Sadly, we only had an hour to order, eat, relax and pee before Max had to get us to our next destination, Vatican City, to meet our Vatican guide, the lovely Vanessa.  Along the way, he points out the Castel Sant’Angelo, the fort where Floria Tosca flings herself to a bloody death at the end of the opera, Tosca (Gotta' love that Puccini) and The Passetto, where Tom Hanks secretly scuttles to the Vatican in Angels and Demons.

This Morning's Itinerary:

Arrive at the Port of Civitavecchia and meet our guide, Maximilliano

Drive to Rome and see...
Pyramid of Caius Cestius
Circus Maximus / Palatine Hill
Colosseum / Arch of Constantine / Roman Forum
Piazza Venezia / Il Vittoriano - Tomb of Unknown Soldier (Wedding Cake)
Fontana di Trevi
Spanish Steps
Piazza del Popolo - North Gate & Santa Maria del Popolo Church
Piazza Navona - Church of St. Agnes & Four Rivers Fountain
Lunch at Bar Navona - discovering San Benedetto iced tea
Castel Sant’Angelo

Next Day in Pompeii and Amalfi Coast
Afternoon in Vatican City

Previous Day in Florence and Pisa